YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE MORE THAN GOING TO CLASS? TRYING TO JUSTIFY MISSING IT TO SOME FUCKING OVERPAID WEIRDO. I'M PAYING LIKE 20 GRAND A SEMESTER. IF I MISS A CLASS. I'M PRETTY SURE THAT'S ME BEING STUPID, BUT I'M BEING STUPID AND PAYING A STUPID AMOUNT OF MONEY TO DO IT. SO TO AVOID THIS AWKWARD EXCHANGE DURING THE NEXT CLASS, WHICH HAS ALSO HELPED ME MAINTAIN A PRETTY DECENT GPA OVER THE YEARS SOMEHOW. I HAVE YOUR SOLUTION.
E-MAIL THE FUCKING LADY
SO I HAVE TWO CHOICES, STAY IN AND DO MY HOMEWORK AND WATCH MODERN FAMILY OR SOME SHIT (BORING) OR GO OUT AND GET FUCKED UP WITH MY FRIENDS SOMEWHERE. YOU KNOW WHAT I'M DOING. SO I STUMBLED IN AT LIKE 4 AM, (BENT, OBVIOUSLY) TRYING TO E-MAIL THIS LADY AND I CAN'T EVEN FUCKING SEE STRAIGHT. WHAT I MANAGED TO COME UP WITH WAS THIS.
HI PROF KUSER,
I DECIDED TO GO OUT AND GET FUCKED UP TONIGHT, SO I'M NOT GOING TO BE IN THE CLASSROOM WHEN YOU GET THERE TOMORROW (OBVIOUSLY). I HAVE ATTACHED THE HOMEWORK AS A .DOC FILE (CAN BE OPENED WITH MICROSOFT WORD) BUT IT'S GOING TO SUCK BECAUSE I WAS RUSHING IT EARLIER SO I COULD GO OUT AND DRINK WITH MY FRIENDS (SEE ABOVE)
PEACE OUT,
IAN ATHERTON
WHAT I ACTUALLY ENDED UP SENDING WAS AN E-MAIL WITH SOME ELABORATE STORY ABOUT HOW MY BROTHER GOT ATTACKED BY A PACK OF DALMATIONS OUTSIDE A FIREHOUSE IN CHARLESTOWN, BLAH BLAH BLAH. THE USUAL EXCUSE. I PROBABLY SHOULD'VE KEPT IT REAL, BUT FUCK IT, THE LADY LOVES ME NOW. UNTIL SHE READS MY BLOG.
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